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John III

The disciples are a group constantly without number, though officially their number is equal to of greater than the number that the Great MEH Guru himself dictates. One person in their midst had been tempted by the anti-meh, and was an unbeliever, but still sought MEH. her name was Reyth. She had realized that she was falling into the trap of the anti-meh and was spending way too much of her time on productive activities when she could be wasting her life away, surfing the Great Wave of Life, and being a follower of MEH.

One day she went and asked a really bad question. Imean there are some questions that you just don't zask, and this was one of them, but Reyth asked it anyway, rebel that she was.

"What is this MEH thing anyway?" she dare to ask.

Suddenly everything calmly happened at once in a loud silence. The room started to shake, the Red Sea parted, dogs barked, cars stalled, radios went silent, doors opened and closed, a train hit a brick wall, an American History teacher's pants turned a new shade of plaid, and a hijacked plane dumped its cargo on a boat heading for Cuba to pick uo an illegal shipment which would never ever reach its final destination.

The MEH Guru with almost painstaking effort descended from the sky on a purple and pink frisbee, eating a banana and drinking a classic Coke. He threw the banana peel on Reyth and when she peeled it off he let out a chuckle and said, "MEH, ignorant child..."

His voice trailled off and a large, booming voice seemed to come from heaven, but it actually came from a control room around the corner whichused an ultra-megawattage super-surroundsoundtm stereo system to rock the room Reyth was in. What sounded like Ed McMahon but felt like sonic booms continued the sentence which the Guru had begun.

"... is the Genesisi and the Apocalypse, it is night and day, it is black and white, it is all Good, and it is all Evil, it is everything, and yet nothing, it is small, it is large, it is sound, it is silence, it is anger and joy, it connotates nothing but its meaning is infinite with its upper boundary accessible by the 3 pm plane from Pittsburgh. It is something that does not physically exist, but it can be utilized anywhere, it is waves at the beach, clouds in the sky, the pain in arthretic hands, the ant you stepped on, the pyramids in the Valley of the Kings, the United Nations building in Geneva (the Japanese own the lease on the building in New York; MEH can't touch them), it is the third floor of a parking garage in Cleveland, it is what you feel a split second after you stub your toe, it is the sum of the first number and the product of its parts, it is equal to the divisor of A over B times the page number. It simply is."

Well, needless to say, Reyth was shocked and she sat there going "Yup, yup, uh, unhuh, yup, ok, fine, sure, whatever, hey! No problem..."

Then the Great Guru spoke.


Reyth vanished. No puff of smoke. No gigantic explosion. No computer animations. She simply became nothing. The Guru shook his head. A screaming voice could be heard from heaven. It was not really coming from heaven, but from the control room around the corner. A disciple said to her, "To come back into the world of living technocolor, you must truly believe the wisdom and beauty and utility of MEH."

After what seemed like seconds but really was hours, Reyth finally did believe, and the disciple unlocked the door to let her out of the control room into the bright technocolor sunlight. She too became a disciple and is one of the Multitudes today, living the good Life of MEH.